It’s time. Renewed energy. Increased focus. A familiar desire.

You know the feeling. And, all of the old adages. “Dust yourself off, and try again.” Or, “if at first you don’t succeed.. ” For you, that could mean reentering the dating scene. (Gasp!) For someone else, it’s time to polish off the old resume, or register for one more class towards a degree, again. For me, it’s the pursuit of publishing for my first manuscript. (Oh, that old thing.) Yup.

Last summer got off to a great start. My first writer’s conference, publisher’s pitches, and even four requests for my whole manuscript. Four rejection notices and eight months later, I lost my writing focus.

Good news. It’s time to try again.

The tricky part is that my legs are shaky. It’s scary shit. I’m learning about a new industry (publishing), while trying on a new language (who I am as a writer), and I need to talk about something that has been my deepest, darkest secret, for fifteen years (that who I am today, was largely shaped by my time as an Adult Entertainer). Eek! Awkward.

I call this stage I’m in, and similarly, any new life stage that makes us feel unsteady, aka vulnerable: Bambi legs.

To step into unfamiliar territory makes our footing unstable.

Why? Because new is unfamiliar and uncomfortable.

New, means feeling like a child all over again.

New is uncertainty. Uncomfortable. Like, ripping off a Band-aid to expose the raw, tender, new flesh underneath, uncomfortable.

We have to try on a new way of being for a while before our footing feels solid, and we can find our strength. It’s like, when a sailor has to get used to the movement of a ship to develop sea legs. Or, when Bambi, (yes, the cartoon character) has learned to walk, but he steps out onto ice for the first time. Bambi’s legs give out. He slides across the pond. Bambi legs.

The first time you go to a bar, single, after ending a long term relationship. The first few weeks after a job change, or getting laid off. Your children go off to college, and you are alone in your quiet house. Bambi legs.

You wouldn’t expect a toddler just learning to walk to run a marathon. Yet, we expect ourselves to soar right out of the gate. Even, when something is brand new. (Guilty as charged.)

I believe when things are new, kindness is key. We must be kind to each other, and that starts with being kind to ourselves.

Since the publishing world is new for me, I’m trying on a few things to make it easier on myself. (Ah, kindness.)

1. I’ve committed to talking about my manuscript (i.e. practicing this new dialogue) with friends and former colleagues every week.

2. I’m trying on a new perspective. If who I was, was a professional writer, what would that look like? This means looking at building a foundation, like a business plan, that looks at branding, online presence, building an audience, a content strategy & calendar, and on and on.. So far it’s just a really long word doc, but it feels good. (Progress.)

3. (Go big, or go home.) I’ve registered for Writers Digest, Writer’s Conference & Pitch Slam in NYC in August.

4. I’m reminding myself that it’s ok to ask for help. I don’t have to do this alone. (I always forget that asking for help is not only ok, but empowers others to be of service.)

The publishing path is a long hard road. It may never come to fruition. For now, that doesn’t matter. Being back in action feels good.

Is there something new you’ve been putting off because, you know… awkward? Have a friend or colleague going through big life change? Remember Bambi legs, and find a way to take baby steps. And always start with kindness.